Worst Pattern Ever: Donna Karan Collection, Vogue Patterns V1378

Donna-Karen-Vogue-V1378
Donna-Karen-Vogue-V1378

I’m making you suffer with my photo of my pattern envelope because I don’t want to risk having this image disappear….I want this to live forever. Here’s the link to the Vogue Patterns for as long as they have it listed…

I bought this pattern mostly for the pants pattern, like so many, but I was in need of a basic wrap shirt pattern as well. The pants pattern does look really cool, and if you look for reviews on this pattern, you will find plenty of people happy with the pants.

This isn’t about the pants. I haven’t made the pants yet. I’m not sure I will at this point….that is how messed up the shirt is.

First off – they sort of warn you…the photo on the pattern envelope of the shirt shows the back is kinda wonky. That’s cool…I can deal with a bit of wonky. I HAD NO IDEA.

back-warning
back-warning

Let’s go through the pattern first, shall we?

The pattern pieces were clearly printed backwards.

wrong-direction
wrong-direction

If you put your pattern pieces on your fabric like a NORMAL SANE person, these pieces are going the opposite direction. I did see AFTER cutting my fabric, that they do have a layout for the right side of fabric – who the fuck does that??? Oh, someone who screws up, then mickey-mouses it afterwards instead of REALLY fixing it, THAT’S WHO.

right-side-fabric
right-side-fabric

Ok, then let’s look at the 3 DIFFERENT edge finishing directions. 3. that don’t match up. I was still following the directions at this point, thinking this has GOT TO come together at some point, right? RIGHT??

finished-edge-1
finished-edge-1
finished-edge-2
finished-edge-2

WRONG. Even in their diagrams, this CLEARLY does not match up. At all.

finished-edge-3
finished-edge-3
finished-edge-4
finished-edge-4

Whatever, right? I mean, who’s going to know but me, and next time around, I can just do it the way I want to, right? HAHAHAHAHA ha ha    ha. Hm.

Oh, let’s move on to the magical hem, shall we? We have in step 14, it is not hemmed….we have in step 15, it is hemmed….wait…this basting instruction was for…the sides, right? Says nothing about the hem…but…uh…

This is where I through the directions out the window and just figured out the rest myself…and never hemmed the damn thing anyway.

Hem-magic
Hem-magic

Here at step 19, the last step before it just goes to the pants, there’s something about topstitching…wait, no, it’s capped, TOPSTITCH the basting….but WTF…are you talking about the sleeves? This is the section on the sleeves…or the hem…or…WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY TO ME, VOGUE?? Oh, just forget it….

But wait….lol. there’s MORE.

I used a nice cotton hatchi sweater knit with really great stretch and recovery. Really, it has NO sag. I wish I remember where I got it, because I feel I threw it away on this POS pattern.

It looks kinda normal, if I’ve adjusted it with a mirror and carefully only face forward.

looking-normal-1
looking-normal-1

I mean, it’s not doing my figure any favors, but it’s comfy…enough….and I attribute that to the fabric ONLY.

The back weirdness could be blamed on the user, right? I mean, conceivable I could suck enough to make something ugly back there on my own…and that would be believable except generally I don’t suck that bad, and the rest of the evidence.

 

twister
twister
crazy-sweater-back-1
crazy-sweater-back-1

Here…just…look. Somehow, Vogue has made me into a marsupial. I feel like this would be great if I was breastfeeding….with one breast only…yeah.

the-reveal
the-reveal
marsupial
marsupial
baby-wrap
baby-wrap
kanga-sweater
kanga-sweater
floppy
floppy

Can you believe that mess? See how the inside piece is nice and flat…it would be so much better with two of those pieces….but no, I’ve got some kind of shoplifting, baby smuggling sweater. WTF?

Now, the fun part…trying to put it back together all smooth-like without a mirror….

no-mirror
no-mirror

LOL. Not really doing my 40-year-old, mommy body any favors, is it?

I broke down and just bought the Papercut Patterns Coppélia pattern anyway, like I should have in the beginning. Sure, I could try and futz with the Vogue Pattern and make it work, but the Indies out there are doing such higher quality work, I’m just going to file it ‘maybe someday’ and let it go. I will chop that kangaroo pouch off, however, and resew that, and hem it or tack it together. It’s a bitch trying to figure out how to put it on the way it is…

So, yeah. This is the WORST pattern I’ve ever come across…and I’ve put together some weird Burda and Ottobre stuff, and even pattern tested with partial instructions. If you’re buying it for the wrap sweater, just pass. In fact, there are a billion other places to get wrap shirt and legging patterns, I’d just skip this one all together.

12 Replies to “Worst Pattern Ever: Donna Karan Collection, Vogue Patterns V1378”

    1. I know, right? I really love the fabric, so at this point I’m hoping I can save it. It’s so bad. I ended up just tossing the pattern. I don’t need to hoard that piece of crap.

  1. Looks like a top I made once! Yeah, the pattern photo was not a good sign! I loved this post! That fabric is gorgeous though. I wonder if you could take it in or something?

    1. yeah – I think I’m going to take it back out of that weird seam, cut it to fit in the opposite side – the one it should have been in the first place, and call it good. it’s so soft and comfy, I HAVE to save it! lol

  2. Not that it redeems the pattern, but I interpret the diagram at step 15 as showing basting, not a finished hem, and step 19 as referring to the hip hem. I got the pattern too- but for the pants, although the top was starting to look appealing. Sorry/thanks for the sacrificial warning!

    1. Oh totally…random placement for hip basting…and so much up for interpretation, really. It’s just all so too bad not to have a laugh over. I tossed the whole thing. Lesson learned!!

  3. Just my two cents. But when cutting fabric folded the right sides are inside; however, when cutting single-sided it is always with the right side up. This has been consistent with sewing books from the 1930s on up to the big 4 patterns now.

    1. I totally forgot to reply to this! lolz. yes – I totally agree – and I often have to check and recheck things like sides the button holes are “supposed” to go on, etc., and that would have changed…well, the front panels from left to right. It would not change the fact that the panels have a different finish to the top seams, the squirrelly back…the weirdness of it all. it would just be a mirror image. I’ve seen some lovely versions of the pants – but the top is a loss IMO. 😀

  4. Vogue patterns SUCK! I’ve been sewing over 50 years and their lack of understandable instructions just astounds me. The fashions are amazing but that’s all. They never fit.

  5. The instructions look fine. Where you have put connecting arrows across the instructions, you are leaving out many steps. And as Isaspacey says, for single layer fabric the good side is up. It actually looks like your sweater is the reverse of the original photo. I like the Vogue patterns because they are interesting. The Dutch pattern magazines I use give fewer instructions for more work. The key is really in paying attention to the details. The knit MUST stretch as per the guideline on the envelope. Too much stretch can make a garment sag and too little will make the garment to tight. Grain lines MUST be followed, especially for a knit, and anything gathered must be basted to gather and then to hold it in place. Then you stitch over or immediately next to the basting. When the stitching is finished, the basting may be pulled out. It looks like the raw edges were narrow hemmed as the garment was built. There is also a glossary for any thing that doesn’t make sense. If you still have the pieces, you can gather your patience and slowly make a new one.

    1. Thank you so much for taking the time to criticize a 5 year old tongue-in-cheek post on what is truly a crappy pattern. I’m sure it must be entirely user-error as Big 4 could never produce a bad product. I hope you’re doing splendidly during this quarantine and bringing similar sunshine to the entire internet.

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